Dear Everyone in Computer Security class,

I am a little nervous taking this class since I have not programmed in a few years and I have more of a formal background in chemistry than computer engineering, but I have always loved computer security so I am giving it a try. We have to do our labs in pairs, however, so can everyone come together as a class and help me out? All I need is for people to wear a little sign. Don't worry, I am not asking for anything as demeaning as name tags; all I want is a little pin or maybe a colourful band that indicates how intolerably unsocialized you are. You know how you tag those inconsequential stories that you upload onto Digg? Kind of like that, but a little more introspective: green for generalized social anxiety, blue for autism, red for sociosexual phobias, black for anxiety-cum-projectile-vomiting, and how about a letter indicating how far you have progressed through the English alphabet. Or maybe a star if you are actually awesome and scared of the class like I am. Want to go see Apostle of Hustle with Janet and me? TV on the Radio? Yeah, I know that it is at the ShitHaus, but it's only $20 and Cookie Mountain is way too cool to miss. Wait, you are actually a cute girl in addition to loving music, writing your thesis on quantum cryptographic implementations, and appreciating German portraiture of the 1920's belonging to the Verism movement? No? Oh. Too bad.

With healthy fear,
Ilia.

PS. A seperate label regarding personal hygiene would also be appreciated.
PPS. May some deity have mercy on the souls of the three girls in the class.
PPPS. Isn't there anyone else on this blog at UofT to come to class with me??? 55000 students and no letter writing hax0rs?