Dear family ahead of me in the Starbucks line,

Should you really be letting your 12-year-olds order coffee? It's obvious this isn't a one-time treat. Those kids rattled off a short paragraph each in their order, including specific types of beans, milk substitutions, and other coffee code words that I've never even heard of. And they all ordered larges (or grandes, or ventis, or whatever the appropriate Italian word is).

Congratulations, you've addicted your pre-teens to coffee. What the hell is wrong with you?

It's just plain wrong,

Rob