Dear Paddy's Brew Pub,

Why has such a terrible fate befallen you? You were too young and beautiful to suffer such damage. I cannot help but feel guilty. I was not there to protect you, and you caught a blaze. Alas, I was coming back to Wolfville to visit you this weekend, but it was too little too late. I am sorry I was not there to dose your flames, even at 6:00 AM. If you recover, I will make an effort to visit more often.

Soberly yours,

Tim

P.S. I cannot help but wonder what caused a kitchen fire at 6:00 AM when you do not open until noon. Were you cheating on me?